April 03, 2011

Innovators Are Strange

When I say innovators, I don't mean the engineers that build cars or anything. I mean the first people to ever do a certain thing.

Think about it. Who in the world first said, "Hey, let's tug at a cow and drink whatever fluids come out of them!"

Who decided to put little seeds into a the ground, and consume whatever sprouted upward?

Who said, "Let's throw some rocks into a fire!" to make plaster?

I have an answer. Time travelers.

In the future, they said, "This whole hunting-gathering thing sucks. I don't even have a home. This is world's only permanent settlement. But hey, we have these things we're calling se-ads in the basement. Maybe if we starting implanting them into the ground a few thousand years ago, we could have large groupings of people!"
Then the other guy says, "Yeah! Good idea! Hop into the time machine I made while mooching food off the rest of the group."

And so agriculture began.

Without agriculture, there could never have been time machines, says the infamous reader.

LIES! Well, fine, if you won't accept that, then aliens, says I.

Aliens were just ahead of us, so they came over and did us a favor. They're hoping that now that we're indebted to them, we can do them a favor later, like, you know, sacrificing our planet to them.

Don't look at me like that. It's completely plausible.

Your Clearly Sane Blogger,

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

But you know how agriculture really came to be, right? Female gatherers would transport grains which naturally grew a really far distance away from where they lived, and dropped seeds along the way by accident. Then they would walk on them, digging them into the ground, and then it would rain and they find the wheat or whatever grains they had been transporting along their paths. They put two and two together and thus, farming was invented by women.

Women invented farming.